Couples Counselling · Nanaimo, BC
Couples & Marriage Counselling in Nanaimo
The same argument on repeat, or a silence that keeps growing — you don't have to figure it out alone.
Book a free 15-minute consultationVirtual sessions for couples in Nanaimo and across British Columbia · $175 per session · free 15-minute consultation first
When couples counselling helps
Couples counselling in Nanaimo is available virtually through TEO Counselling Services. We use the Gottman Method — a structured approach to couples therapy built from decades of observational research — for partners working through conflict, disconnection, trust injuries, or the slow drift that happens when life gets busy.
Some couples come to therapy not after one bad fight but after the same fight has been repeating for years, in slightly different words. You might recognise some of this:
- —The same argument keeps resurfacing and never resolves
- —One of you brings something up, the other shuts down
- —You've become efficient co-parents or roommates, but not partners
- —Trust was broken — through an affair, a betrayal, or repeated small letdowns
- —You're not fighting at all anymore, and that silence feels worse
- —One of you is considering leaving and hasn't said it out loud.
Counselling is also worth considering before things feel critical — around a new baby, a move, a career change, a blended family, or caring for aging parents. These transitions strain even strong relationships.
How the Gottman Method works
The Gottman Method comes out of more than four decades of observational research by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, who studied thousands of couples to identify what actually predicts whether a relationship lasts. What that means in practice:
We start with assessment. The first sessions map how your relationship actually functions — where conflict escalates, where connection has thinned, what each of you is protecting.
We work on the patterns, not the incidents. Recurring arguments aren't always about the dishes or the money. They sit on top of something unspoken. The work is identifying that structure so the same conflict stops running on a loop.
We build specific, practicable skills. How to raise a hard topic without triggering defensiveness. How to repair after a rupture. How to stay regulated when a conversation gets heated.
The Gottmans identified four communication patterns most corrosive to relationships — criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling — which they termed the Four Horsemen. Recognising them in your own conversations can be the first shift couples notice.
What happens in the first couples counselling session?
The first session is a joint conversation where both partners describe the relationship as each of you experiences it — what brought you in, how conflict tends to unfold, and what you each want to be different. Nobody is blamed, and nobody is asked to relive the worst fight in detail on day one.
From there, the assessment phase can include a brief session with each partner individually, along with structured questionnaires drawn from the Gottman assessment tools. That combination gives a fuller picture than either partner could comfortably give in front of the other, and it surfaces the pattern underneath the incidents.
Then we sit down together, go through what the assessment found — the strengths worth protecting as much as the patterns doing damage — and agree on a plan. You'll know what the work involves before you commit to it.
Is marriage counselling different from couples counselling?
No — marriage counselling and couples counselling are the same work under two names, and both are open to any two partners in Nanaimo, whether you are married, engaged, common-law, or dating. The approach, the fee, and the structure are identical.
Some couples reach out specifically about a marriage — before a wedding, after years of drift, or when separation is quietly on the table. Others are earlier in a relationship and want to change a pattern before it hardens. Both are ordinary reasons to come, and neither needs justifying.
Is couples counselling only for relationships in crisis?
No — and waiting until crisis makes the work harder. Research on help-seeking suggests couples can wait years between noticing a serious problem and reaching out. By then, patterns have hardened and resentment has had time to accumulate. Coming in earlier means working with more goodwill still in the account.
We also see couples who are fundamentally solid and want to stay that way — partners preparing for marriage, navigating a big transition, or wanting to communicate better before something breaks.
Virtual sessions across Nanaimo and BC
All our sessions are virtual. For couples, this can be an advantage rather than a compromise:
- No coordinating two commutes. You join from home, or from two different locations if one of you travels or works shifts.
- You practise where you live. The skills get applied in the room where the arguments actually happen.
- Easier to sustain. Couples work depends on consistency, and virtual sessions can be easier to keep booked over months.
We work with couples in Nanaimo, Ladysmith, Parksville, Qualicum Beach, Duncan, and across British Columbia — including Victoria, Vancouver, Surrey, and Kelowna.
Sessions run 7 days a week, 12pm–9pm Pacific, so evenings and weekends are genuinely available — which matters when one of you works shifts, is on call, or spends part of the week off-island for work.
Who you'll work with
Mohamad Shabib — MACP, CCC, Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying), CRPO — Ontario. Founder and lead therapist. Trained in the Gottman Method (Levels 1 and 2), EMDR, and Internal Family Systems. Offers sessions in English and Arabic.
Alison Shaji — MA Clinical Psychology, RCC. Trained in CBT and DBT, and works with clients across British Columbia. Offers sessions in English, Hindi, and Malayalam.
We're registered with the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association (CCPA) and the BC Association of Clinical Counsellors (BCACC). Therapy is available in English, Arabic, Hindi, and Malayalam. For couples who share a first language other than English, being able to argue — and repair — in that language matters more than people expect.
Sessions and fees
| Initial consultation | Free, 15 minutes |
| Couples session | $175 |
| Individual session | $150 |
| Format | Virtual, six provinces |
| Availability | 7 days a week, 12pm–9pm Pacific |
| Insurance | Depends on the designation your plan covers (CCC or RCC) |
Frequently asked questions
How much does couples counselling cost in Nanaimo?
Couples sessions at TEO Counselling are $175. The initial 15-minute consultation is free, and a small number of reduced-fee spots are held — if cost is a barrier, mention it during the consultation. Whether a plan reimburses couples sessions depends on the designation it covers (CCC or RCC) and on its own wording — check whether it specifies a per-session maximum.
Do both partners have to attend every session?
Yes, since the work is about the relationship rather than either individual. That said, we sometimes hold individual sessions with each partner during the assessment phase, and occasionally when one person needs space to work through something separately.
What if my partner won't come to counselling?
It isn't a dead end. Individual therapy can still shift a relationship — how you respond to conflict, what you tolerate, how you communicate. Some partners become willing once they see change rather than being asked to agree to it in advance.
How long does couples counselling take?
It varies with what you're working through. Rebuilding after a significant trust injury can take longer than adjusting a communication pattern, and we'll give you a realistic sense of scope after the assessment rather than committing you to something open-ended.
Is couples counselling covered by insurance in BC?
It can be — if your plan covers counselling by a CCC or RCC. Coverage for couples sessions specifically varies by insurer, so it's worth confirming with your provider. We provide receipts with the registration details insurers require.
Can we do couples counselling online, or do we need to be in the same room?
Online sessions are an option for couples therapy, and you don't have to be in the same physical location. Some couples join from one room; others connect separately when schedules or travel make that easier.
Nanaimo & BC mental health resources
Therapy is not a crisis service. These are free and staffed around the clock:
- · 9-8-8 Suicide Crisis Helpline: call or text 9-8-8 (Canada, 24/7)
- · Vancouver Island Crisis Line: 1-888-494-3888 (24/7)
- · BC Crisis Line: 1-800-784-2433 (24/7)
- · Kids Help Phone (for young people): 1-800-668-6868, or text CONNECT to 686868
If you are in immediate danger, please call 911.
No pressure, no assessment on the first call — just a conversation about what's going on and whether we're the right fit.
Written by Mohamad Shabib, MACP, CCC, Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying), CRPO — Ontario — Founder & Lead Therapist, TEO Counselling Services. Member, Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association.